In my case the counsellor believed my loss of libido had probably started with a strong dissatisfaction with my own body post-childbirth. Because I felt unattractive, I couldn’t believe anyone else found me desirable or interesting.Reinforcing this, I had perceived Paul’s increased interest in ‘manly’ things as a lack of interest in me. I had even suspected his late night working might be a cover story for an affair which had reduced my interest in sex still further.In addition, she believed I had coped with the new responsibility of children by letting the control freak side of my nature take over. As a result, I couldn’t do anything that invovled letting myself go or losing control in any way; something our sex life had once involved in spadefuls.The more Paul wanted me to let go, the less likely I was to do it. The less I did it, the more he wanted me to. A vicious circle; painfully predictable!The bad news was that, although we both still loved each other, we had reached a point. "And what are the metal strips on the sides of it for." Just a minute," said Joan as she rummaged through the drawer. A few moments later she lay a small black box and several other devices with wires trailing from them on the bed. The box had four knobs on the front and two on the top. There were also two openings on the top that looked like they were small headphone jacks. "This plugs in here," she said as she connected the wires from the dildo to the control box. Holding up three, small circular bands an inch or so in diameter she set them aside and said, "We won't be needing these."When Sara asked "Why?" she held the bands up by their wires and answered, "Just what part of your body would go through these donuts?" Then holding up a small curved cup with a long metal tube sticking out of it she added, "And what part of a man's body would this be for?" Oh," giggled Sara. She picked up a set of clamps with wires trailing from them and said. "I have a pretty good idea what.
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